Up here in Beer and Cheese land, the Clean Clothes Fairy is getting pretty sick and tired of all the Leichs' family shenanigans and has threatened to walk if we don't give in to her demands. I found this note written in Tide on top of the washing machine:
Dear Users of the Clean Clothes Fairy laundry services:
I'm only a fairy, for crying out loud. What are you trying to do to me? Night after night I do your laundry and magically put them in your drawers so you can have clean clothes the next day. Your familial matriarch has contacted me regarding gaps in my service. These are not gaps, but rather a problem with your family's laundry habits. I can't do my job if you don't do yours.
1.) I can only do laundry I see. The laundry of late I've been doing of Larry Potter and Hoover's has pretty much been only PJs and shirts. I'm not sure if your school's dress code has changed, but last I heard, underwear and pants are required. Are they taking them off and setting them on fire? Because I can't seem to find them, though I am assured that they have plenty clothes. Maybe have them check their new carpeting of Old Navy jeans and Fruit of the Looms. Or perhaps that's not carpeting MOM,
[Editor's note: Sounds like she gets a little snarky herself.]
2.) Not to point any fingers, but maybe someone could pre-soak the, ahem, biological stains. I know boys sometime have a few issues in that department, but really, do you want to expose all of the other clothes to this. Especially when the stains don't come out the first time. Think about it.
3.)Do you not know what a laundry basket is for? I put your clean clothes in there merely as a transportation and collection method before you are to put the clothes in their respective drawers. What is NOT used for? Storing the clothes. You have dressers for a reason. Please use them.
If I don't see improvement soon, I will replace your detergent with the extra-allergic kind and forgo the dryer sheets. Don't believe me? Just try me.